February 8, 2010


Fiance and I had a reality check early on regarding the fact that life is not perfect and therefore weddings certainly will not be perfect.

I feel like my engagement ring really symbolizes us and myself. Simple, frugal and unique. Plus I love gold, fair-trade/sustainability and organic-style jewelry. Sarah Perlis fit the bill. I had showed him some of her work months before. And afterward he spent a long time searching through google images to find her website and surprise me with the ring. Unfortunately he ordered too small. So I had to wait a week, wearing my engagement ring on my pinkie until we had the time to get it resized. I was so excited to finally wear it once that was done.

That was also finals week for me, absolutely insane as usual. Thursday night I had a huge group presentation (that didn't go so great), then headed to Yard House to meet up with two of my TAs from England when I studied at Cambridge. It was their first time to America and they were only going to be in the area for that one night. So even though I had a final the next day to study for and I still needed to print out and organize a 150 page report to be turned in the following morning. But I had to take at least an hour break to sip some cider while catching up and reminiscing. It was wonderful. After Yard House I drive all the way home (over 20 miles). Only to realize the moment I walked in the door that I had left behind my flash drive in one of the computers at school, which had the entire project on it. I freaked and raced back to my car, calling everyone I knew to see if someone could find it. Luckily someone did and was holding on it while I drove the almost 20 miles back to school.

I finally get to school and get my flash drive. Sigh of relief. I sat down at one of the computers just to double check the project and make sure everything is there. Then I look down at my beloved engagement ring. and the diamond is gone.

I was stunned. I felt like someone got the wind knocked out of me. The last time I had seen it was at Yard House. My friend helps me trace my steps across the industrial carpeting, down the stairwell, across concrete and asphalt to my car. Scour my car for a teeny tiny rough diamond. Nothing. Because that diamond is uncut and small, it would be pretty much impossible to find, if one could even see it, it would look like a rock or a piece of glass. I tell my friend thanks and I'll be back to the lab in a minute. I get in my car and sob as I call fiance. To tell him that the beautiful diamond he gave me nine days earlier which he had saved up who knows how long for, was gone.

The first thing he says? "It's just a ring. Don't worry about. You have other things to deal with right now. We'll figure it out. Just get through finals. I'm sorry and I love you." One of the many reasons why I'm marrying this man.

I attach sentimental value to EVERYTHING, ticket stubs, packaging, brochures. It's ridiculous. So when it comes to one of the few things that actually deserves emotional attachment, I was a wreck. But he was right. It's not about the ring itself. It's about what's behind it. We lost the diamond, but we still love each other and can't wait to be married. It's not about the "stuff", the material objects. So I picked myself up, got everything done and managed to pass my finals.

We talked to our parents and our moms put together some old jewelry we could sell to put toward the new-diamond-fund. We thought about getting Fiance a credit card and putting the fee on there and start making payments so he can build up his credit. I didn't want a whole new ring, (frankly I still didn't even want a new diamond, I wanted my old one), so we held our breath and emailed Sarah Perlis to ask about how much it would cost.

And then a miracle happened. She emailed back with something along the lines of "Oh no! I'm so sorry. I will happily replace it for no charge." WHAT?!! And the universe was right again. There are still good people who do good things. So we sent back my little gold band through UPS and insured the heck out of it. Then I waited patiently for almost a month. I just got the ring back on Friday. So we've been engaged for 2 1/2 months and I've actually worn my engagement ring for a total of 7 days. The new diamond is more pear shaped than round and I'm super paranoid about it. But it will be a great daily reminder, both in the story behind it and the irregular, imperfect shape of the diamond itself, that life will not be perfect but it is still beautiful and full of love.

1 comment:

  1. Good people and a sweet reminder that love is precious. (If that's not too sappy!)