p.s. did I mention I got my dress?
Because I did!
My mom and I stopped into David's Bridal on a whim while I was home over christmas. I tried on a few dresses and just felt like i was playing dress up. Then I finally tried on one that I'd been eyeing online for a while. It combined all the different elements I wanted in a dress. I felt comfortable, felt like myself. No crying just calmness. Also it was on sale and I got to take it home that very day. It also happens to go along with my mom/grandma's veil quite well. yay!
It only needs hemming and a bustle, otherwise it fit like a glove! Also David's does a complementary spot clean/re-beading/pressing when you get alterations so even though I took home a sample, they'll make it look good as new.
That's out of the way. No more looking at dresses for me, I've been very good. Deleted all the pictures, un-bookmarked the websites. I can't imagine wearing anything else. It's hanging safely in a closet at my parents house. I can't wait for Fiance to see it when I walk down the aisle!