March 29, 2011


One thing I am so glad I did is spend the night before the wedding with my bridesmaids. After dinner we went to a local dive for some drinks and girl time. Then 3 of the 6 crashed in my hotel room, cousin/maid of honor was in the room next door. For a group of 6 girls that had never met before the wedding festivities, they all got along swimmingly. It wasn't awkward, just super fun and comfortable. The 4 of us ended up staying up until about 1:30 am talking and giggling and/or laughing hysterically over things like this. seriously there were tears and snorts. much needed release.

While I didn't get a ton of sleep, I slept well. I awoke ready to go at 6:30 am. I looked out the window to see blue skies, not a cloud in sight. We took our time getting ready, while Shawntel started to do my hair and makeup. We brought up some breakfast (eggs, sausage & potatoes - and yes I DID eat) from the hotel lobby (props to the hampton inn, YUM breakfast, also the building was LEED certified!). The rest of girls came up and we all leisurely got ready. My wonderful photographer came up to start recording the day. It was such a relaxed morning. There were mimosas and french macarons that I picked up from a fabulous little shop in downtown sacramento earlier in the weekend. We actually were completely ready to go well before we needed to head to the church.

Miss Shawntel - my bridesmaid/hair stylist/makeup artist/veil maker :)

{all photos by shawntel}

We headed to the church about an hour before the ceremony, we made sure to avoid the boys as we went into the bridal room at the back of the church to put on my church and get prepared. Put on my dress, had our bouquets delivered, had one of the bridesmaids run over and present Husband with his wedding gift (I'm waiting for a good photo before I reveal), saw my parents for the first time that day (they had been putting the finishing touches on the reception site). Once I had my dress and veil and bouquet...this was the point where I started feeling nervous...

time to get married!

(I got a little link happy in this one. also: dress reveal tomorrow!)

March 28, 2011


Okay. I'm ready. I was cool as a cucumber throughout the whole wedding planning process. I knew what was important to me and I absolutely didn't care about the rest. It wasn't until the day before the wedding when I started feeling worried and guilty, for the most ridiculous reasons.

You see, this winter has been one of the craziest and most unpredictable I've ever seen in California. As soon as the 10-day forecast began to include our wedding date it read rain. rain rain crazy thunderstorm showers rain. All along I totally knew that this was a possibility and though to myself "so what, I love rain! we could take fun umbrella pictures! it'll be so cozy!" So we had the rentals delivered and tent set up thursday before the wedding. Thursday night was an out-of-control rain/wind storm. When we arrived at Husband's (!) parent's house Friday morning to start setting up, we discovered that the tent had shifted about a foot away from the house (despite the multiple 55 gallon drums full of water that it was staked off to), away from the overhang and the wind had pushed the rain in and the entire ground (and all of the tables) were soaked. It was freezing cold and wet still. We had rented a heater, but it only had 10 hours worth of propane that needed to last through the end of the day saturday so we didn't want to exhaust that one. We pulled the tables into the garage and wiped them down. We brought out a space heater and a professional grade steamer to begin steaming the giant round table cloths that we had purchased...thinking that maybe we should have started doing that sooner. And then we blew the circuit in the garage. twice if I'm not mistaken. meanwhile the bulk flowers were brought in and were beginning to be arranged, linen napkins were being folded, vases and centerpieces assembled. A few of my bridesmaids showed up to help, which was wonderful.

No one was letting me do anything, which was fine because I had started freaking out that all of my guests would be soaked and frozen the following day. I drove to Sacramento to pick up my aunt and cousin at the airport, where it was sunny, and got a text from my parents that it had begun to hail and then snow. perfect.

I get back to the reception set up chaos to find out from Husband that one of his best friends and one of our supplemental photographers, who lives in colorado, told him the night before, after avoiding Husband's calls for about a week, that he "couldn't afford the trip". Which is totally understandable in and of itself, but c'mon dude, you JUST figured out you couldn't make it?? a little notice would've been nice. Also his bachelor party the night before ended in a bit of drama... So husband is pissed. yay wedding...

Out of the whole day I had maybe folded one napkin and moved one candle. People kept telling me to eat and not help. All the while my family members are freaking out, being impatient, snapping at each other. (we don't do well under pressure and time constraints...)  So I decided to go to the hotel to check in for the night. My mind was still freaking out so I decided to just hang out at the hotel until the rehearsal dinner. So I call one of my bridesmaids at the reception site to tell her I wouldn't be coming back, and she tells me "actually I'm at an urgent care right now, I started feeling dizzy and having shortness of breath and I've been sick on and off for a few months now and I just really needed to get checked out." turns out the poor thing had bronchitis! so I told her to skip the rehearsal and she could take her antibiotics and pass out in my hotel room and we'd see how she was feeling in the morning.

By this time I'm not doing so well. I text Husband to tell him about bridesmaid, turns out he's in the hotel too, hanging out in his friends room. So he comes up and we just sat and he told me that everything will be alright (that is totally his catchphrase). It completely calmed me down. And it reaffirmed that he's the one I'm supposed to be married to.

The rest of the evening zoomed by. The rehearsal went well, Husband's film school directorial training totally came out as he began ordering people about. Lots of laughing and it was so fun to finally get all of our family and wedding party into the same room. (fun fact, this was the first time my parents met Husband's dad and step mom, even though they live approximately 5 miles away from eachother and we've been dating for 5 years. weird huh?). Dinner was delish, pretty sure I don't have a single photo, but we ordered approximately 12 large chicago style pizzas and had lots of leftovers!

Next up: Bridesmaid bonding!

March 14, 2011


I still don't really know where to start. This whole marriage thing is so surreal still. The wedding happened. It was wonderful, I felt very present and yet it felt like it went by quickly at the same time. Maybe the enormity hasn't hit me yet. And I don't think it has to do with us living together prior, because really that doesn't define a marriage, that defines roommates. I started thinking about an analogy from my old pastor and I think it summarizes how I'm feeling very well:

There are certain titles we hold throughout life that we don't necessarily "earn". It's a title we gain and then must grow into. Our goal is to live to the full potential of that title. And it's a title, it doesn't define us, but becomes a part of who we are. Marriage is one of those situations. The minute you say your vows you become a husband or wife. That doesn't mean you have any clue what that truly means. No matter how much marriage preparation you've done, how many books you've read or how much advice you've received. Because you must grow into that role of husband/wife, and it will take the rest of your life to do so. And that looks different in every single relationship.

To further the analogy, having kids is similar (moreso with the first child). Once a child is born you become a mother or father. Not that you have any idea what that truly means, but you now have that title.

So maybe I'm grasping that it's going to take a lifetime to grow into this role of wife. Because I'm not sure I feel like I can fully call myself that with only 2 weeks experience. Does that make any sense? Nonetheless, I love being a wife and I love my husband.

March 9, 2011


{photo by family member}
So I'm back. and married (!). Getting back into the daily grind isn't too bad except for the millions of emails and blog posts in google reader. We have quite a few photos posted to facebook of the wedding and our photographer said she'd probably be able to have hers to us in another week.

The whole day was so surreal, I don't know how to describe it yet without simply going into the play-by-play. It was so comfortable, relaxed, and fun, joyful and loving. We had hiccups of course, but does anyone even want to hear about those parts? It didn't phase me at all. We've been trying to call each other husband and wife as much as possible because it's fun and so weird to hear.

Marriage is awesome.